Imagine being so terrified that you are unable to move. Your legs go numb and start to shake uncontrollably. Your hands, woven in a tight clench, are frozen in place. Your whole body is tight, and breathing is becoming more and more of a challenge. A panicked expression is smeared over your face as you try to catch your breath. For me, this was a reality. Was I being chased by an angry bear?
Was there an ugly spider crawling across my floor? Am I on top of the 2000 ft tower? No. The reality was that I was sitting in the guidance office, frozen and unable to move, as a result of speaking one word. You have probably heard of the fight-flight- freeze response to fear. When met with fear, the body prepares to either go into fight mode, to run away from the situation, or to "play dead". The body involuntarily goes into these modes when it perceives fear. Though I only said a word and I was not being chased by a bear, my body does not know the difference between the two situations, but rather goes into this mode when there is a perceived threat. I used to believe that my body and mind took on two different personas. Whenever I would speak, it would almost feel as if my body was angry at my mind, and that in order to get its revenge, it would elicit the freeze response. As a result, I would often ignore the rational thoughts in my mind telling me that speaking posed no threat to my well-being, as I was terrified to make my body upset. How did I stop this feeling from taking over each time I spoke? To do so, I used a technique called grounding. Grounding is effective because it basically shows your body whose boss! It involves showing your body that, despite feeling paralyzed, there is no way that you actually are paralyzed, and you can in fact move. Now, there are many different ways in which you can ground yourself. Here are just a few different techniques that I have used in the past that have been effective:
One of the scariest things about being in this state is that you, quite literally, feel paralyzed. Something that I found helped me was to force my body to move in order to prove to my mind that it was in control of my body. I have found that touching something, whether it be holding each charm on my Pandora bracelet or petting my dog, Finn, has greatly helped me gain control again. By using these techniques, you too can regain control of your body and show it whose boss!
1 Comment
Jeremy Quiring
5/4/2015 03:52:21 am
Hi Lauren. I'm thankful that you are expressing yourself in this blog because it provides a lot of insight for us in the school to be able to appropriately understand and approach you at the school. Keep up the good work! :)
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CategoriesAll About MeMy name is Lauren and I am 20 years old. I have an anxiety disorder called selective mutism that limits my ability to speak outside of my home. I believe that this disorder has touched me for a reason, and my life mission is to bring much needed awareness to this heartbreaking disorder. Welcome to my journey. Archives
January 2018
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